Survivor Stories

Sisters… Abused, but Alive

I never thought I would be alive to tell this story, or even a small portion, nor did I think I would have any kind of strength to put it into words, but I will do my best.

I am only one, of many, who has gone through abuse, but come to find out, both my sister and myself have gone through our individual abuse traumas with our boyfriend/husband.

I did not know what she was going through and she did not know what I went through at the time either.  We never told each other until recently, for fear of our partners, and what they would do if we each told.   She told me that he had threatened not just her, but our family as well.  My husband always threatened, but I never knew any other men did that to women I knew, until now.  I always thought it was someone else, and I always thought that this was my fault.

As tears run down my face, as I write about this now, I think of not what pain I went through, but the pain my sister did.  My survivor sister!   It is different when it is someone close to you,  that has gone through something similar to yourself.   What pain she must have endured;  I can relate.

I know she has not begun to tell me all she went through, and I have not told her all either, because I don’t want to burden her with my trauma load, while she is dealing with her own.

I was not only physically beaten and emotional abused, but also sexually assaulted as well by one of my soon to be ex-husband’s friends, while he watched.  Nothing was done to help me, because the police took their words over mine.   I cannot begin to tell you each event that happened, because it is still so raw in my mind, and painful to go over, but that is just one example.  Not only did I get beaten by my husband first, but then his friend took a turn with me and sexually assaulted me.     But, I thank God I am alive!  I thank God that my sister is alive as well!

I can’t imagine all she had to endure.

It is ridiculous at the “circus” atmosphere in the courthouse, in our courtroom alone, with all that I have observed that abused women have to further endure by the system.  Do people not care???!!!

Where is the justice?!

If you or someone you know needs help, call the Groundwork 24-Hour Domestic Violence Hotline at (815) 729-1228.